“Everything looks great!”

The Endocrinologist has spoken in her three-word addendum at the bottom of my test results: there’s nothing obviously wrong with me, at least in any of the areas she tested for. While I’m glad there’s nothing wrong, I was kind of hoping whatever she tested for would yield some clues.

The Nutritionist remains puzzled by my total lack of progress: “I wonder what your metabolic rate is.” Uh, I’m thinking it’s in the basement, or being warmed by magma. To get an answer to that question, I am still trying to get an appointment set up at the fitness facility with the dodgy carbon dioxide detector. No one was there today when I called — another snow day?

Yeah, so here’s the part where I whine and wallow in a most unattractive fashion.

My damned adductor is acting up again, for no apparent reason, asserting itself during a two hour driveway-clearing session this morning. It’s been snowing non-stop, making getting the 25 minutes north to the gym impossible on many days. I often don’t feel like running on our treadmill, so I blow it off; it just seems completely pointless. I’m chronically injured (as is Jonathan). I’m getting fatter, for reasons no one understands. I cannot run outside because of the snow and ice. What the fuck am I even training for? I can’t even set any goals in this current state. I will part with $290 for two Chicago Marathon registrations next week, but I don’t even know why. I don’t know if I can even handle a 4 mile race in 10 days, physically or psychologically.

Why did I love running? What did it feel like, to believe I could improve? I’m having trouble remembering.

5 Responses

  1. I’ve seen worse whining and wallowing, so there’s room for improvement there.

  2. Hi Julie,
    I’ve been following your blog for a while (found the link originally on Jaymee Marty’s blog) but haven’t commented yet. So first of all – hello! And secondly, I am so sorry to hear that your adductor is giving you $%&! again. That is so frustrating. Ewen is right though, if you REALLY want to whine and wallow, you will have to work a little harder at it ;)

  3. P.S. I love the Houston Hopefuls site as well. Great idea, great stories.

  4. Damn, but you people are a tough crowd.

  5. This is good news, you can do outside the fitness by clearing snow and not many people can do that in the world, certainly not in Australia Ewen ;-).
    And know that every disadvantage has an advantage, look at the benefits!.

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